The 7 Best Books on the Psychology of Love ...

By Corina • Jul 10, 2025

People often say that every painting, every poem, every novel or every song ever created is in someway about love. Love is a central theme in art and in our lives. Here is my list of a few books that offer very valuable insight into improving one’s life since they can help us understand better where this phenomenon comes from, how it works and what it means for the human condition. Here are the 7 best books on the psychology of love that you should consider:

1. Why We Love - Helen Fisher

Why We Love - Helen Fisher On iTunes at: itunes.apple.com
Book critics call this wonderful book “a groundbreaking exploration of our most complex and mysterious emotion.” This book actually presents the results of a study in which Helen Fisher scanned the brains of the people who had just fallen madly in love and she proved that primordial areas of our brain “light up” when we experience this feeling. She explains what we experience when we fall in love, why we choose a specific person and how romantic love affects your sex drive and your feelings of attachment to your partner.

2. The New Psychology of Love - Robert J. Sternberg, Karin Sternberg

The New Psychology of Love - Robert J. Sternberg, Karin Sternberg On Amazon at: amazon.com
In this wonderful book, the authors have gathered more than a dozen expert contributors to address the question about defining love. It’s actually a superb compilation of well-documented research on the dynamics of love. It deals with a wide range of truly scientific aspects of love but the research covered is informative and fascinating.

3. Falling in Love: Why We Choose the Lovers We Choose - Ayala Malach Pines

Falling in Love: Why We Choose the Lovers We Choose - Ayala Malach Pines On Amazon at: amazon.com
This is an excellent book that outlines data that clearly shows how you might be imprisoned by your own pattern of choosing a specific lover. It’s a combination of hundreds of studies, clinical experiences and observations that helps us discover what makes us fall in love with people. It’s a wonderful and insightful book that offers an interesting perspective on love.

4. A General Theory of Love - Thomas Lewis, Fari Amini, Richard Lannon

A General Theory of Love - Thomas Lewis, Fari Amini, Richard Lannon On iTunes at: itunes.apple.com
This wonderful book draws on the latest scientific research to demonstrate how relationships function, how psychotherapy really works, how parents shape their child’s developing self and it actually offers us a new perspective on human intimacy. It’s a good read that will help you understand this wonderful feeling a bit better.

5. Getting the Love You Want - Harville Hendrix

Getting the Love You Want - Harville Hendrix On iTunes at: itunes.apple.com
This book was first published in 1988 and it has helped millions of couples attain more loving and satisfying relationships. The author, Harville Hendrix, is a couples counselor who created Imago Relationship Therapy, which is based on a variety of disciplines such as Gestalt therapy, depth therapy and cognitive therapy.

6. Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work - John Gottman, Nan Silver

Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work - John Gottman, Nan Silver On iTunes at: itunes.apple.com
A lot of people could say that Dr. John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage because he has studied the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over the course of many years. This book is actually the culmination of his life’s work and it contains 7 principles that can guide people on the path toward a harmonious and healthy relationship.

7. Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love - Sue Johnson

Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love - Sue Johnson On iTunes at: itunes.apple.com
In this book, Dr. Sue Johnson presents Emotionally Focused Therapy to the general public for the first time and this technique was described by the New York Times and Time magazine as the couples therapy with the highest rate of success. This book is easy to read and it’s understandable both for professionals and also for people who are interested in improving their relationship.

There are a lot of studies and books that have tried to explain the wonderful feeling called love. I just mentioned a few in this little article, but I’m sure that there are many more I could add to this list. Do you know any other great books on the psychology of love? Please tell us more about them in the comments section!

Sources:
brainpickings.org
psychcentral.com

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the psychology of love?
The psychology of love is about understanding how and why people experience love. It looks at the emotional, mental, and sometimes even physical ways that love affects us. It also explores how love changes over time and how different people show and receive love.
Can books on the psychology of love help my relationship?
Yes, books on the psychology of love can offer insights into how relationships work and give you tools to improve communication, deepen your connection, and understand your partner and yourself better. They can also help you recognize unhealthy patterns and work on them.
Are there books on the psychology of love for singles?
Absolutely! There are books that focus on helping singles understand their own love behaviors, how to choose a good partner, and what to work on within themselves before getting into a relationship. Reading about the psychology of love can prepare you for a healthy and happy future relationship.
Do these books only talk about romantic love?
No, many books on the psychology of love also talk about different kinds of love, like the love between friends and family members, or even the love you have for yourself. They can explore how these different types of love impact your life and happiness.
How often should I read books on the psychology of love to improve my understanding?
Reading regularly can help you keep the ideas fresh in your mind, but there's no strict rule. You can read books on the psychology of love as often as you feel you need new insights or guidance, or simply when you're curious to learn more about the topic.
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